Nibiru Space Launch Planned For Next Week
For the second time in three weeks, a Trump-funded space launch will attempt to confirm widely circulated reports that Nibiru has frozen in space and no longer endangers the Earth. Earlier this month, President Donald J. Trump rallied the aid of SpaceX founder Elon Musk, a shadowy entrepreneur whose Falcon 9 rocket blasted off into space on January 14, carrying classified Nibiru monitoring equipment.
That mission suffered catastrophic failure; Democratic saboteurs tampered with the rocket’s alluvial guidance systems, sending it plunging into Venus’s scorching atmosphere. SpaceX and the Trump administration concealed the true nature of the January 14 launch, claiming the rocket carried standard communication satellites.
During the week of 30 January, weather permitting, SpaceX—funded by Trump to the tune of $300,000,000—hopes to launch another rocket to gather critical information on Nibiru’s current state of cyclic movement. This time, however, the lift off will take place in Florida, not California. Part of the reason next week’s launch will occur at Kennedy Space Center is because, sources say, Democratic spies have been spotted lurking near the Vandenberg launch site. The Trump-Musk team has planned for all possible contingencies and has taken steps to mitigate future sabotage attempts.
Last Monday, Elon Musk joined Trump for a “closed-door” breakfast meeting at the White House. Our source within the administration heard Trump’s thunderous voice while standing outside the White House’s Roosevelt Room, where the clandestine meeting took place.
“On Monday morning President Trump met with many business leaders,” our source said. “After the meeting officially concluded, Musk stayed behind. He and Trump talked for nearly an hour, and I specifically heard them discussing details on the launch. Trump was dishing out a lot of money. He wanted to avoid another failure. Trump hates failure. He’s deeply concerned about this Nibiru thing, and is afraid that handling it incorrectly will cause his approval ratings to plunge lower than they already are—if that’s possible. So he and Musk hammered out details.”
First, Musk explained the science behind the failed launch: agents of opposition reprogrammed Falcon 9’s telemetry system using a modulated ultra-high frequency radio signal. The Rocket’s electronics, it turned out, were vulnerable to existential interference, a flaw SpaceX engineers solved soon after Falcon 9 crashed into Venus.
Trump was heard barking at Musk: “If you don’t get it right this time, you’re fired!”
When Musk suggested hiring additional security to guard the launch site, Trump brushed him off with a dismissive wave of his hand, saying, “That’s not your concern. Prince has taken care of everything.”
The comment referenced notorious “Blackwater” mercenary Erik Prince, who, according to an interview published in Democracy Now, has been secretly advising Trump from the shadows. Our source said that Prince and his sister, Betsy DuvVos–Trump’s pick for Secretary of Education–were at the White House and conferred with President Trump shortly before Elon Musk’s arrival.
“There’s a lot going on here we don’t yet full understand,” our source admitted. “But I’m sure Trump hired Erik Prince to safeguard the launch.”
Additionally, Trump invested in an elaborate security apparatus designed to intercept and repel foreign microwave signals that attempt to penetrate the launch platform. The Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) has imposed a “no fly zone” around Kennedy Space Center for the entire week. Any aircraft straying into the restricted area will be ordered to change course immediately, and eliminated with extreme prejudice if they fail to comply.
If the mission is successful, the Falcon rocket will reach mars in just over two days. The payload module will establish orbit over Mars’s southern polar region and deploy thermal imaging optics and motion sensor devices able to gauge accurately whether Nibiru’s axes of inertia have caused the celestial interloper to freeze in space. The payload module is said to include a transverse funnel capable of siphoning red iron oxide dust from the Nibiru system for comparison against known liquidity factors.
The exact time and date of launch are closely guarded secrets, known to only Musk, Trump, and a handful of engineers who have been sworn to secrecy.
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